Giving up control
Last weekend was Thanksgiving. I am thankful for my family, for my health, and most importantly for the grace and mercy God has expressed to me over my life. As we were preparing for some of the weekend, we ended up in the hospital with Caleb again. We woke up about 12am on Wednesday to the sound of our son coughing (sounded like a seal bark), and sounding like he could barely breathe. Turns out he had the flu (not H1N1) as well as croup.
What struck me about this whole situations was a couple things. First, it was yet another lesson in the lack of control Kim and I have over or son. I don’t mean his actions or anything like that, but just even in his safety and well-being. We must rely fully and completely on God to protect him, because we really cannot.
The second lesson was more of a personal attitude adjustment. You see, when he started coughing, Kim nudged me and told me to go check on him. I was not happy, to say the least. I was just about asleep, and I didn’t want to get out of bed. However, once I got up and saw his need, my attitude completely changed. I felt horrible for the discontented attitude with which I awoke.
So what have I learned? I’m still in need of God “chiseling” away at the quirks. I am still in need of the ‘occasional’ (probably much more often than I realize) attitude adjustment to be humbled and to walk meekly. Thank you Jesus, for continuing the work You have begun in me!